Dealing with Death

I have just ministered at my fifth funeral of the year. Last year I did close to twenty funerals. Funerals drain me. They take alot out of me. It is difficult as a Pastor to hold the grief of a family, community on your shoulder. To make matters worse, after losing someone close to you (in my case my Grandfather), every funeral and the preparation up to it(visiting the family, securing arrangements, etc) is going through the grieving process all over again. Death is inevitable. We have to deal with the reality of it, but it is never easy. No one wants to ever truly say good bye. Many times, funerals are filled with empty phrases that are meant to comfort, but as well intentioned they might be, still makes one feel numb and hurt. I approach grief and funerals by trying to apply the love of God in our worst and painful moments. God is a great big God, who not only can handle our questions, but also our tears. Pain is part of the process and it just as real as joy is. God does not remove the pain, but God allows His love to be present and lessen the sting of it. I still think about my lost loved ones and yearn for them greatly, but I have tried to allow God's Love to immerse me and saturate me so that even in those moments, God's Love reminds me that He is still there. As a believer, Death is our transition to being with God. The truth of the matter, Death is what takes us closer to God. Jesus' death and resurrection took the sting from Death and the victory from the Grave. Death is never easy, but our God is bigger than death.

Fearless Faith

A few weeks ago I crossed the most pivotal and important crossroad of my ministry. I admit that i was in a season of frustration that i could not shake. I was borderline depressed and I know that a pastor of a thriving church should not say that, but I was down in the dumps. I was going through the motions and people were being blessed, but I just could not get out of this funk. I was functioning well, but I just felt like I was in a rut. All of that changed when my friend and mentor, Pastor Arthur Jackson from Miami came and closed out our March Gladness Revival. He preached a message entitled, "Don't Miss It" out of Deuteronomy 1: 19-38. In this message, Pastor Jackson said that the Children of Israel missed the Promise Land because they valued Logic over the Lord, did not believe that Opposition could be Overcome and the voided the potential of God's Power. In the midst of hearing this message, I began to understand the source of my frustration: I had stopped trusting that it was all in God's hands. Our ministry has some awesome opportunities that can impact the Kingdom in a mighty way, but I had become so invested in what others were saying in order to bring the Vision to pass, instead of relying on God. This was so unlike me. I am a person of EXTREME Faith. I have seen God do some awesome things and the only reason that I am here is because I have trusted God every step of the way. That night I repented and gave it over to God. I realized it is not my job to figure it out, rather it is my job to simply Trust that God will make a way. It is a freeing experience to know that God loves us so much that all He requires us to do is have faith in Him. I am a better Pastor, Person and Believer, simply because I know that God has it all in control. i am so excited now because I know without a shadow of a doubt that God is going to do it. I cannot wait to provide the details in later blogs. STAY TUNED.....

PS-perhaps there is someone reading this blog that is where I was. You are frustrated by trying to figure everything out. I want you to know that it is not to late. God is just patiently waiting for you to take your hands off the situation and begin trusting him. You can do it right now. Pray this prayer, "God, forgive me for not having complete Faith in you and your Word. I apologize that I thought that it was totally up to me to figure everything out. God, I now surrender everything to you. I totally submit my will and desires to you. I know what you have spoken over my life and I believe that it shall come to pass. I praise you now in advance what has already happened through yopur Word. Amen." Bless you. Go Forth in FAITH

Falling in Love....

I must admit, I am in LOVE. Crazy, I know. My nose is wiiiiiidddddeeee open. I know that someone is wondering how did I get to this place. It was a peculiar journey. I have not felt this feeling in a long time. As a matter of fact, I had almost become numb and thought I would never feel this way. Most people do not realize that I struggle with abandonment issues. This is something that was formed in me in from a young age. I had some very close people to me growing up who proved not to stand the test of time. I am a fiercely loyal person. I have always held people in suspicion because I have been hurt before. This has even been difficult in the pastoral ministry. I have had people leave without a valid reason. This has caused me to form my own shell. I never thought I would ever find someone who would always be there. I never thought I would find someone who can handle my quirks and Love me beyond my bad and moody days(don't look at me with that tone of voice. I am not the only one with "bad and moody" days). I was getting cynical that there would be no one who would understand as I struggled to articulate what was wrong. Someone who would not be mad if was too tired to talk or text before I went to bed or who would understand that life is 24/7 ministry for me. I finally found someone who does not mind when I just feel like sitting still and saying nothing or just let me take a few mins(or hours) to just unwind and slow my mind down so that i can relax. Here is the funny thing, my Love has been there the whole time. As I was looking for this love in different places and situations, my Love sat patiently on the side and waited for me. Even when i continued to dwell on ministry as my safe place, my Love just stayed right there. As I worked to try and prepare and progress myself, my Love was right there. I am so relieved to finally find this Love that I have been looking and longing for. I just want to take this time to publicly thank the one who has always been there, loving me every step of the way. I want the world to know how much I am devoted and committed to them. So here goes.....Thank you JESUS for being there. I love you so much, because you first loved me.........

Learning How To Manage The Moment

As I enter into a new, different, stressful, but exciting phase of ministry, I am reminded of the need and neccessity of learning how to handle each moment that comes. I know that we have heard the phrase, "Maxmize the Moment". This is so true. We should try and do our best and place our best foot forward at every instance. However, i think that while we are trying to maximize every moment, it is paramount that we manage every moment. By "Manage the Moment", I mean that we need to learn to think beyond the moment in regards to how our actions will influence our future and others. So many times, we just think about the moment, that we fail to realize the domino effect that each moment has to other moments. The things we do today can cripple our tomorrow. Who wants to "negatively" maximize a moment. Treat people today like they are important to your future. Treat each assignment like your future depends on it. Lets us pray to "Maximize and Manage the Moment". Soli Deo Gloria